WOODBURY — One team has never felt more like home.
Pomperaug Youth Softball has been my home for more than four years with nothing but good memories, spending one after another weekend together.
But are all teams like that?
“What the [expletive] are you doing?” said a player from another team that I played on.
The actions of a player, whether it’s rolling eyes or giving another player a dirty look, can make a teammate not want to continue. Teammates have one of the biggest effects on other players.
“Some players from teams that I’ve been on have said things in a negative way,” says freshman Ashlynn Blum, “like when I have messed up and they say something about it.”
A team that has never made me question whether I belong there is Pomperaug. I joined a team that has been playing together since they could walk. They welcomed me to their team with open arms.
“Pomperaug is a good team to start playing softball on because everyone’s so inviting, and we are all such good friends,” says Pomperaug High freshman Campbell Macumber.
But some teams haven’t been the best experiences for me. Players have made me not want to show up to practice. And they make me question, do I still love this sport?
All it takes is one person to make you want to quit a sport you have been playing for years.
“Stop being stupid,” one teammate said.
“Hit it into their [expletive] feet,” another yelled.
“Can you be better?” one asked sarcastically.
“Try [expletive] better,” another snapped.
While to some these comments may mean nothing, when it’s coming from teammates you look up to, it affects you mentally.
“In the past, one of my teams struggled being a team. We became very divided and harsh with each other,” says Nonnewaug junior Anna Crocker. “In return, this caused many of my teammates to lash out on their teammates on the field. To some, these comments seemed like nothing but a push of motivation, but to many like myself, these comments sent me spiraling into hating the sport.”
The sports that I play are team sports; everyone must work together. An important part of that is the team having a strong bond, and coaches recognize the importance of those relationships.
“The rituals of getting the equipment, doing the laps, doing the drills – it’s those day-to-day things that are really more important than [trying to force] the actual bonding,” says Nonnewaug field hockey coach Janet Crocker.
Pomperaug was a very strong team not just with the skills, but the friendships. Our team having strong bonds made our team stick and get to championship after championship.
But on other teams I’ve been on over the years, our issues between the lines and off the field led to us being unsuccessful physically and mentally on the field.
One of my Pomperaug coaches always told me to have a short memory or forget fast. That’s one thing that has always stuck with me. Mistakes happen and people say things they regret, so it’s important to move on from the past and not hold grudges against teammates.
The best teams don’t judge each other for mistakes or times when you’re upset. Those are the teams that feel like home.
This is the opinion of Lila Farrelly, a sophomore two-sport athlete at Nonnewaug and a reporter for the Chief Advocate.
