WOODBURY- “What do you want to be when you grow up?” 

The burning question that fuels most conversation starters between adults and teens.

For some, it’s a simple question– a one-word response that takes no thought nor a feeling of unhappiness with their answer. 

But for others, this question could feel like a thousand pound weight placed on their shoulders, like a punishment to respond and fulfill the inquirer.

According to the74million.org, a website dedicated to uplifting students’ education, a survey teens took on if they are ready for their career the text states, “roughly 4 out of 10 students are unclear about their career expectations, double the number from about a decade ago.”

Although it might seem that way, the question isn’t meant to be malicious, but why do some teens feel this way about a simple question?

“I feel a little bit of uncertainty about life after high school and I don’t know what college I want to go to yet, and I’m not incredibly certain about what job I want to do or what my major will be,” says Jazzy DelPrinceipe, sophomore at Nonnewaug.

As the time grows closer to the inevitable decision, some may find themselves prepared. While others find themselves left empty-handed.  

For me, the answer to this subtle question makes me feel uneasy. One day I feel like I know what I want to do, where I want to go, and how I’m going to do it. But then I remember “Can I really accomplish this?” or “Do I actually want this?” Then I go back to the start, where I don’t know what I want to do, where I want to go, or how I am going to do it. 

When I see people talking about college or jobs beyond high school, I get a pit in my stomach. I feel as if everyone around me has it figured out, and I’m just wallowing in my despair and unknowingness.

I also feel an unbelievable amount of pressure to have it all figured out. My family is highly accomplished, my mom and dad went to Cornell University and my brother is currently a senior at Columbia University, so I feel like I should have everything figured out, with the best grades and top of my class.

 But I don’t.

 And I’m not. 

While I know that I don’t need to have it all figured out — as I am just a freshman, I feel the constant pressure from administrators, adults, and even my peers that I need to know everything for my future. 

Kathy Green, Nonnewaug’s CCRC, who helps students all over Nonnewaug, sees kids who are stuck within their career paths and gives advice on how to overcome these hardships. 

“Build strong habits now that will allow you to be successful in your future. Learn to ask for help, manage your time and resources, set boundaries, take care of yourself (sleep, food, move, get outside) and be willing to make mistakes,” says Green. “Some of the best learning can happen by learning from mistakes.”

But, someone might have their eyes set on a college, job, or maybe even a different path. The anxiety doesn’t just stop after you have finally decided that you are all in for this path, because the fear of maybe not getting this goal or not being enough for this dream you have built your life around sets in. 

“I really want to be a lawyer but I’m worried because I have some goals I want to achieve, like going to an Ivy League college,” says Leah Decastro, a freshman at Nonnewaug. “But I’m worried that I’m not good enough or smart enough.” 

Even for NHS seniors, they face this decision head on, the deadline of what they want to do comes closer each and every day. 

Jade Rinaldi Nonnewaug High School senior, unlike many, is set and knowing of what she wants to do as graduation approaches her.

“I’m aware of what I want to do” says Rinaldi “I want to be an equine vet, I feel like I have a lot of things I want to do already planned out. I already know the college that I’m going to so I feel like that’s a lot out of the way and off of my shoulders”

There is a lot of uncertainty in life, you never know what tomorrow will bring you. Not knowing what is to come after high school isn’t the end of the world, though it is unsettling and scary. It’s just another day of not just being able to predict your future. 

I may not know how I’m going to do it, or what I want to do, but I do know it’s not just me, people all over the world feel this way and many people who felt this way 10 or 20 years ago are doing amazing things now. For example, the highly accomplished late musician Freddie Mercury worked as a baggage handler before he found his talent in music. Though his passion was music– he wasn’t sure if he was going to make it or not. Yet, he is now still known for his band Queen, arguably one of the most famous bands today. 

The thought of my future and what it may bring does bring me to shambles, because what if I don’t get everything I want? But, when have I got everything I want? Eventually, you will find your path, your way in life. Right now, though it may seem scary, it is just temporary and a small step to a big achievement. As Steven King once said, “The scariest moment is always just before you start.” 

So, next time someone asks you that small question that seems so big, don’t be afraid to say “I honestly just don’t know– and that’s just fine.”